Working with our Shadow in a Soul Relationship

Have you noticed that now as the earth is receiving much more light than ever before, the shadow parts in many people, as well as dysfunctional power structures, have become much more visible or less “hidden” from plain sight?

If we are continuing with our own most important inner work, we find we can transmute and move through old wounds/triggers much faster than ever before. But at the same time, it appears that relationships or people who are no longer an equal resonance of energy simply fall away – more quickly than ever before.

Carl Jung left us with some amazing insights and revelations about his “shadow work”. He said that we do not grow/become “enlightened” through only focusing on the light or imagining “figures of light”, but by looking deep inside i.e bringing to light the unconscious, through facing and transforming our shadow *. He also said that “to confront a person with his own shadow, is to show him his own light”…

This article was written by me several years ago. I wrote it to honour the journey of shadow work in a relationship, which over time, with steady commitment and devotion, allows us to grow to become a much more authentic expression of our true selves.

As we continue with this shadow work, we open ourselves towards a deeper capacity to feel and share love, and attract relationships that are more supportive, authentic and harmonious with who we are becoming.

However, I believe because we are here to evolve and continue to grow, this journey is not linear, a straight path or finite,…Therefore, our inner work will always take us deeper and higher, much like an infinite energy spiral – returning to our innermost core and then expanding out towards the ether.

* Our shadow is made up of our unhealed, hurt, vulnerable parts of self – often originating in childhood but remaining with us throughout life. We can choose to ignore our shadow and unconsciously project it out onto others OR embrace and work with it for the many deeper gifts and insights it can offer us on our journey through life.

Rainbowtree Woman

Everybody wants a loving relationship,… but few people are really open or prepared for the ongoing commitment and challenge of shadow work i.e. to take full responsibility for our own projections, inner child wounds and personal healing.

Relationships are so important because the deeper we are connected to someone physically, emotionally and spiritually – the greater the opportunity or catalyst for healing our inner child and transforming our core family and generational wounds.

Without this awareness, we may continue to protect or react from our wounds (hurt inner child) through becoming defensive, angry and blaming others, shutting down or avoiding intimacy altogether.

If we pretend that everything is wonderful and perfect on the outside, we deny ourselves the sacred opportunity to work with the truth – the unpleasant emotions that get triggered in us. It is only through acknowledging that our shadow/wounds exist, that we can begin to grow towards…

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2 thoughts on “Working with our Shadow in a Soul Relationship

  1. Hi Jamie
    We are on the same page in regards to Jung and the shadow. Celtic spirituality and Jung is too hard for most people. I experience this all the time here in New Zealand. Yes we are all in the process of healing and many people while they think , they do not feel so never move on from pain.I am labelled as being negative but that is not understood either as I get information from my inner well and even when unhappy this too will pass . I have to leave people behind “as Jung once quoted, as there is nothing to keep them around me and they project their unhappy shadow onto me, thinking it is my negativity. I get this mainly from men that think we are on this planet to please them! I call their wound The Fisher King and have done a lot of inner work ( Robert Johnson) in this area. I usually bring up peoples shadow to work with but they defy the healing in this . In many ways I Journey alone but this year I hope to make some Positive connections in regards to my Art work. Where I live there is no scope for what I do so am saving up for a camper van this year and hope to hit the road…..may see you on the highway one day! Love and Blessings Kaye.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Kaye!

      Thank you for sharing a bit of your process, your journey, your heart-felt honesty, and your thoughts regarding Carl Jungs work,… we really appreciate this! I think the 3 of us share a heart-felt connection with Jung and this is special and very bonding.

      You have definitely stimulated more writing for me on this subject, which I will be sharing at a later stage, so I bow to you and thank you!

      If I were not with Juerg and I found myself to be journeying alone again, I would be doing what you are planning to do in NZ. I think it is a fantastic path and beautiful vision for you to hold right now. Having the freedom to roam, mix with others when you want to, share your beautiful art, be connected to nature and maybe the possibility of attending markets and festivals as you travel to be exposed to different people and ways of earning money as you go. We did this one summer, attending spirit festivals, etc in our station wagon, it was fun but quite a bit smaller space than we have now!

      These days, I would feel really good with a reasonably sized male dog beside me (like Cento!! He never misses a beat – oh that’s right, its that ear isn’t it…always on the pulse!lol 🙂 ) …a good dog guardian for companionship is always wonderful. And so good to keep an eye out on anyone dodgy sifting around! Dogs love the camper life, it is in their DNA to roam, be exposed to different places in nature, people, situations and not be fed a daily routine that is always, always the same. In the end, it is about the happiness of you and your dog and I think you can see how happy Cento is, in his shared life with us.

      We both look forward to staying in contact and seeing your journey unfold. We are always here if you wish to share ideas or have any questions about campers or anything about life on the road etc!

      Much love from us 3 and a big “hi!” and tail wag from Cento! xo

      Liked by 1 person

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