Working with our Shadow in a Soul Relationship

Have you noticed that now as the earth is receiving much more light than ever before, the shadow parts in many people, as well as dysfunctional power structures, have become much more visible or less “hidden” from plain sight?

If we are continuing with our own most important inner work, we find we can transmute and move through old wounds/triggers much faster than ever before. But at the same time, it appears that relationships or people who are no longer an equal resonance of energy simply fall away – more quickly than ever before.

Carl Jung left us with some amazing insights and revelations about his “shadow work”. He said that we do not grow/become “enlightened” through only focusing on the light or imagining “figures of light”, but by looking deep inside i.e bringing to light the unconscious, through facing and transforming our shadow *. He also said that “to confront a person with his own shadow, is to show him his own light”…

This article was written by me several years ago. I wrote it to honour the journey of shadow work in a relationship, which over time, with steady commitment and devotion, allows us to grow to become a much more authentic expression of our true selves.

As we continue with this shadow work, we open ourselves towards a deeper capacity to feel and share love, and attract relationships that are more supportive, authentic and harmonious with who we are becoming.

However, I believe because we are here to evolve and continue to grow, this journey is not linear, a straight path or finite,…Therefore, our inner work will always take us deeper and higher, much like an infinite energy spiral – returning to our innermost core and then expanding out towards the ether.

* Our shadow is made up of our unhealed, hurt, vulnerable parts of self – often originating in childhood but remaining with us throughout life. We can choose to ignore our shadow and unconsciously project it out onto others OR embrace and work with it for the many deeper gifts and insights it can offer us on our journey through life.

Rainbowtree Woman

Everybody wants a loving relationship,… but few people are really open or prepared for the ongoing commitment and challenge of shadow work i.e. to take full responsibility for our own projections, inner child wounds and personal healing.

Relationships are so important because the deeper we are connected to someone physically, emotionally and spiritually – the greater the opportunity or catalyst for healing our inner child and transforming our core family and generational wounds.

Without this awareness, we may continue to protect or react from our wounds (hurt inner child) through becoming defensive, angry and blaming others, shutting down or avoiding intimacy altogether.

If we pretend that everything is wonderful and perfect on the outside, we deny ourselves the sacred opportunity to work with the truth – the unpleasant emotions that get triggered in us. It is only through acknowledging that our shadow/wounds exist, that we can begin to grow towards…

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Only your heart and soul can guide you to the truth.

Rainbowtree Woman

Do not believe anything because it is said by an authority,
or if it is said to come from angels,
or from Gods, or from an inspired source.
Believe it only if you have explored it in your own heart
and mind and body and found it to be true.
Work out your own path, through diligence.

~Gautama Buddha

*

Too often, we accept information presented to us as the truth, with no effort to ask any honest, critical, or introspective questions. We’ve become so blinded by outer “nicely packaged” forms of deception – especially, by people we see as having authority, power or “more knowledge” than us.

In the age of information, we are increasingly impatient. Our impatience will lead us away from the truth – every time. Our inability to sit with the discomfort and challenge of “not knowing” will prevent us from any real discernment…

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The Mushroom Trail & our Authentic Soul Path

“If the path ahead of us is clear, we are probably on someone else’s” – Carl Jung

Why is the Mushroom Trail (or meandering through the forest looking for mushrooms), similar to walking our authentic Soul Path?

Carl Jung said; “If the path ahead of us is clear, we are probably on someone else’s”…

As many of you know, mushroom foraging is our passion and “following the mushroom trail” – has been part of our life, for many years. I am truly grateful for these experiences, which have inspired, strengthened and enriched my journey, in both New Zealand and in Europe together with Juerg.

During the Steinpilz/Porcini season this past year in Switzerland, I made this movie (below) to explore deeper some of these ideas (above) ☝️ but also to share from my own journey about finding the courage to walk an authentic Soul Path.

Many people came through 2020, having experienced much “falling away”,…i.e loss, grief, separation, disruption, change, or maybe consciously relinquishing that which was no longer needed or fulfilling on a heart and soul level. Others experienced the distinct, intuitive knowing that they must address a yearning to discover more who they really are and express their creativity, authentic path or soul calling. Maybe none of the above applies to you, but you came through the other-side of 2020 feeling more curious and open,… to learn new things, expand, challenge yourself and grow.

In this new year, let us find the courage to step into the unknown and trust we have all the spiritual support, tools and guidance we need, both within and around us.

Juerg and I are offering soul wisdom, helpful insights and tools from our own experiences (both individually and as a couple), to support others on their own authentic Soul Path.

If you found this video to be helpful, and you would like to know more about my sessions with clients,… please feel free to write to me, for any questions or further information.

Read more sharings about the Soul Journey

Book a Session with me

Visit or Subscribe to Juergs youtube channel

Make a donation to support my/our work – thank you so much!

Please note: In my video, when I refer to “wearing a mask”, I am simply referring to all the different ways we learn to cover over our authentic self – because of societal and family conditioning.

The Mushroom Trail and our Soul Path.

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This past weekend, Juerg and I watched the recently released, incredible documentary “Fantastic Fungi – the magic beneath us”!

I wanted to create another illustration of Juerg (above), to inspire children to imagine the underground, magical mycelium network of mushrooms and how they interconnect, support and feed all life! Do you know a child with a great imagination or who loves to colour in?

This illustration is available for download (PDF Format) so you can print it out and colour in together with your children, grandchildren, cousins, friends, nieces or nephews… If you like, write to me through this website and share a photo of the end result!

This past weekend, I also finally published a video (below) I made during September in Switzerland, while mushroom foraging in a beautiful part of the Canton Berne. I called it, “The Mushroom Trail and our Soul Path”.

If you would like to support my work and future illustrations, I would be very grateful if you would make a small donation to my pay-pal account. This will support my work now and in the future,… so I may continue to buy art materials I need and focus my energies on creating a children’s book together with my partner Juerg. Thank you so much!

DOWNLOAD MY LATEST ILLUSTRATION FOR CHILDREN – HERE

MAKE A DONATION TO OUR PAYPAL ACCOUNT – HERE

More reading from Rainbowtree Woman about the soul journey
and the path of healing and transformation, – click here

What does it mean to be a Gardener of the Soul?

I am reflecting on the lives of two men who have inspired peace in the world through their art, love of nature/gardening, music, philosophy, activism, poetry and wisdom… John Lennon (also a Libran like myself 🙂 ) and Claude Monet.

During his international career as a Musician, Poet, Activist and influential Ambassador for World Peace, John Lennon has been quoted as saying;

“Peace is not something you wish for,
it is something you make, something you do,
something you are and something you give away”

“My role in society, or any artist’s or poet’s role,
is to try and express what we all feel.
Not to tell people how to feel.
Not as a preacher, not as a leader,
but as a reflection of us all.”

“Love is like a precious plant.
You can’t just accept it and leave it in the cupboard
or just think it’s going to get on by itself.
You’ve got to keep on watering it.
You’ve got to really look after it and nurture it.”

“I’m not really a career person; I’m a gardener, basically.”

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“Monet’s Lillie’s”, Monet’s Garden, June 2015 © Juerg Dreamturtle

Every year, some 500 000 visitors come from around the world to visit Claude Monet’s Garden in Giverny, France. Over many decades, millions of people have been touched by Monet’s peaceful and tranquil impressionist paintings. People are attracted because of the essence of calm and peace Monet was able to capture in his beautiful paintings and in his garden. For many years, I had prints of Monet’s Water Lillie’s hanging in my bedroom. When I walked into my bedroom, I remember how the paintings made me feel peaceful, balanced and at ease with my surroundings.

Not all of us have the gift of music and poetry to collectively inspire people’s minds and hearts like John – in a positive and powerful way. Not all of us have the opportunity to create a beautiful garden or the ability to paint like Monet did.

However, I believe we all have the chance in this life to work on our inner selves,…to grow in love and peace by owning and transforming our shadow self (our core wounds), healing and forgiving ourselves and others.

I refer to this work as “Soul Work” – and having been a “Gardener of the Soul” for many years now, I believe this is the true work I am here to do, be and share!

I have learned that the beautiful or impressive garden we create on the “outside”, is not as important as the garden we nurture and grow on the “inside”…

The Garden of our Soul is hidden to the eye but felt with the heart…

The Soul Garden we are nurturing, sustaining, lovingly tending too and growing every day – is the most important and true work we are here for.

As we honour our true selves and continue with our Soul Work, the universe will reflect back to us our inner transformation – we can attract more loving, authentic relationships into our lives and experience a sense of deeper peace and purpose for our journey. Although, this does not mean our healing and growing ever stops or we no longer attract challenges in our lives! However, over time, we can become more of a beacon of light to inspire others towards inner peace, truth and fulfillment for themselves.

Real, lasting peace is not something we can “take” from another or a piece of art or music to temporarily “feel better”. We each have to make the commitment to work towards peace in ourselves and this can be a challenging, demanding yet truly rewarding process over many, many lifetimes of experience and growth.

Copyright © Jaymie Elder (2017/2019)

Featured Photo for this Blog Post: “Sacred Sadness Rose” from my Grandmother’s Garden – taken on Christmas day, many years ago. The photo features in my partner, Juerg Dreamturtle’s book; “Sacred Journey – A Simple Book of Soul Wisdom, Love and Healing.”

The book, “Sacred Journey” is very much about this inner work of growing towards love and peace in ourselves, in our lives and in the world. Why not order a copy of the book “Sacred Journey”  to honour this day – International World Peace Day?

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Find out more about the book “Sacred Journey” by Juerg Dreamturtle here


Photo of Water Lillie’s from Monet’s Garden:
taken by Juerg, June 2015.
Read more about Claude Monet here

“When you know how to listen, everyone is the Guru” – Ram Dass

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“When you know how to listen,
everyone is the Guru”
– Ram Dass

How do we practice compassionate listening?

We practice compassionate listening by spending time alone in communion with nature and becoming comfortable in our own inner silence.

Only then, do we begin to hear with our heart – our right brain, which is connected with a higher intelligence – present in nature and magnified in all of creation.

Only then, do we begin to tap into a magical vibration – the universal energy of love – which we are and always will be part of.

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What does it mean to “commune from the heart”?

To commune from the heart simply means we listen for what the heart is trying to express.

In our relationships and encounters with strangers, we are receptive and open to the feeling, sensory and telepathic messages. Often for humans, these are the messages and clues about what is NOT being expressed, because the left-brain-mind is trying to convince, persuade, manipulate, impress, or control in a person.

We help another person, not by becoming like them and therefore losing our center of Self – but by helping them to see where their words and thoughts are not in harmony with their soul being, heart and body.

We help another person, not by overpowering them with our own thoughts, ideas, or projections of what we would like to see, have affirmed, validated or believed – but by offering a mirror where they have an opportunity to recognise their own light of truth reflected back at them.

Ultimately, we support and encourage a person to feel safe and not to be afraid of their own inner silence… because this is where they access their own innate wisdom and what can only be right and true for them.

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Why did we not learn about this in school?

We did not learn about this in school, because instead we have been trained to utilise our left-brain, which is more easily persuaded and conditioned to obey an authoritative structure or power system. Now, more and more our world moves towards a new set of compassionate, feminine values with an appreciation of our heart’s intelligence at the core.

Anyone can practice compassionate listening – it’s not restricted to those with a degree in psychology, any form of elite status, religious or spiritual authority.

Of course, what we are speaking about is not only limited to human exchanges but how we interact and form relationships with all beings (“seen” and “unseen”) and with all of nature.

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How do we know when we have achieved a “heart communion”
or practiced “compassionate listening”?

We know when we have achieved a heart communion and practiced compassionate listening because both participants leave a conversation or exchange feeling received, uplifted, fulfilled, energised, joyous, lighter and more open.

These are the feelings and signs, which tell us we have truly listened and communed with and from the heart (as it is, in all of nature and magnified in all of creation).

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Photos and text © Jaymie Elder
http://www.rainbowtreewoman.com


More reading from Rainbowtree Woman about the soul journey
and the path of healing and transformation, – click here