Working with our Shadow in a Soul Relationship

Have you noticed that now as the earth is receiving much more light than ever before, the shadow parts in many people, as well as dysfunctional power structures, have become much more visible or less “hidden” from plain sight?

If we are continuing with our own most important inner work, we find we can transmute and move through old wounds/triggers much faster than ever before. But at the same time, it appears that relationships or people who are no longer an equal resonance of energy simply fall away – more quickly than ever before.

Carl Jung left us with some amazing insights and revelations about his “shadow work”. He said that we do not grow/become “enlightened” through only focusing on the light or imagining “figures of light”, but by looking deep inside i.e bringing to light the unconscious, through facing and transforming our shadow *. He also said that “to confront a person with his own shadow, is to show him his own light”…

This article was written by me several years ago. I wrote it to honour the journey of shadow work in a relationship, which over time, with steady commitment and devotion, allows us to grow to become a much more authentic expression of our true selves.

As we continue with this shadow work, we open ourselves towards a deeper capacity to feel and share love, and attract relationships that are more supportive, authentic and harmonious with who we are becoming.

However, I believe because we are here to evolve and continue to grow, this journey is not linear, a straight path or finite,…Therefore, our inner work will always take us deeper and higher, much like an infinite energy spiral – returning to our innermost core and then expanding out towards the ether.

* Our shadow is made up of our unhealed, hurt, vulnerable parts of self – often originating in childhood but remaining with us throughout life. We can choose to ignore our shadow and unconsciously project it out onto others OR embrace and work with it for the many deeper gifts and insights it can offer us on our journey through life.

Rainbowtree Woman

Everybody wants a loving relationship,… but few people are really open or prepared for the ongoing commitment and challenge of shadow work i.e. to take full responsibility for our own projections, inner child wounds and personal healing.

Relationships are so important because the deeper we are connected to someone physically, emotionally and spiritually – the greater the opportunity or catalyst for healing our inner child and transforming our core family and generational wounds.

Without this awareness, we may continue to protect or react from our wounds (hurt inner child) through becoming defensive, angry and blaming others, shutting down or avoiding intimacy altogether.

If we pretend that everything is wonderful and perfect on the outside, we deny ourselves the sacred opportunity to work with the truth – the unpleasant emotions that get triggered in us. It is only through acknowledging that our shadow/wounds exist, that we can begin to grow towards…

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The Mushroom Trail & our Authentic Soul Path

“If the path ahead of us is clear, we are probably on someone else’s” – Carl Jung

Why is the Mushroom Trail (or meandering through the forest looking for mushrooms), similar to walking our authentic Soul Path?

Carl Jung said; “If the path ahead of us is clear, we are probably on someone else’s”…

As many of you know, mushroom foraging is our passion and “following the mushroom trail” – has been part of our life, for many years. I am truly grateful for these experiences, which have inspired, strengthened and enriched my journey, in both New Zealand and in Europe together with Juerg.

During the Steinpilz/Porcini season this past year in Switzerland, I made this movie (below) to explore deeper some of these ideas (above) ☝️ but also to share from my own journey about finding the courage to walk an authentic Soul Path.

Many people came through 2020, having experienced much “falling away”,…i.e loss, grief, separation, disruption, change, or maybe consciously relinquishing that which was no longer needed or fulfilling on a heart and soul level. Others experienced the distinct, intuitive knowing that they must address a yearning to discover more who they really are and express their creativity, authentic path or soul calling. Maybe none of the above applies to you, but you came through the other-side of 2020 feeling more curious and open,… to learn new things, expand, challenge yourself and grow.

In this new year, let us find the courage to step into the unknown and trust we have all the spiritual support, tools and guidance we need, both within and around us.

Juerg and I are offering soul wisdom, helpful insights and tools from our own experiences (both individually and as a couple), to support others on their own authentic Soul Path.

If you found this video to be helpful, and you would like to know more about my sessions with clients,… please feel free to write to me, for any questions or further information.

Read more sharings about the Soul Journey

Book a Session with me

Visit or Subscribe to Juergs youtube channel

Make a donation to support my/our work – thank you so much!

Please note: In my video, when I refer to “wearing a mask”, I am simply referring to all the different ways we learn to cover over our authentic self – because of societal and family conditioning.

Finding your own path and pace in challenging times.

‘It doesn’t matter how slow you go as long as you don’t stop.’ – Confucius

Surrounded by the 4 giants of the European Alps, these days, competitive and serious hiking is very popular in the mountainous areas we spend most of our time in.

I believe we miss so much of the magic, beauty and energy of the mountains if the path we walk becomes a competitive and serious race against time, each other and ourselves.

Equally, in life, if we are always focused on getting ahead to some “where” we think will be “better” or to accomplish a future “goal”  – we can miss the valuable and perfect teachings for where we happen to be right now…

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When I saunter through the mountains and on many of the old pathways in the Aosta Valley region, I find myself connecting with a very ancient and timeless part of my soul.

Whenever I am in nature, I practice the art of walking slowly and with reverence. I also believe in being open (heart) to listen, feel and connect with what or who is coming to me as a messenger. I love to make my own tracks, pause and rest, go at my own pace and usually I resist following designated pathways set out for serious mountain hikers.

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∼ Butterfly Messenger ∼

On a journey in the mountains I took a few days ago, a messenger came to me in the form of a small, friendly butterfly.

I could see in her wings beautiful colours of luminescent green, gold, orange, blue and brown. These colours kept changing as she gently moved from different angles to the light of the sun. She sat on my shoulder – gently and happily – for probably close to 10 minutes before she flew off into the pine forest.

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Before she flew to my shoulder, I had the feeling that I needed to pause, breathe and do a ceremony or simply give thanks before I reached Juerg, Cento and our campervan at the foot of the mountains (where my journey had begun). However, I was not quite sure what was being asked of me, until the butterfly spontaneously arrived. Before long, I realised that my interaction and connection with the butterfly messenger was my “ceremony”.

As a messenger, the teachings of butterfly
are to appreciate and see the value
in each stage of the spiritual journey
and cycles of life.

Butterfly’s life transformation shows us, we each have the possibility and capacity to be reborn by going within ourselves. Therefore, we can draw much value and learn from the cocoon of darkness, despair, doubt, confusion, tiredness and all the emotions we have been conditioned to view as “negative”.

Honouring our feelings of discomfort and disharmony in relation to where we currently are on our journey (as well as what we may see happening around us in the world), is an important part of accepting that we are forever moving through cycles of change, transformation and growth.

A natural part of growth is feeling discomfort and resistance as we move into the unknown! These are cycles of deep change and transformation, which Mother Earth is also mirroring back to us!

Rather than judge these cycles of change as something “negative” or “wrong” – can we allow what needs to occur from a deep place of trust, love and respect… like the life cycle of the butterfly shows us so beautifully?

Can we observe and learn from Mother Earth by working with the mirror she provides us, as well as primarily focusing our energy on our own inner transformational process?

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In the far distance: Monte Bianco (4,810 m) tallest mountain of the European Alps.

∼ Balance and Patience ∼

I am learning that in order to ease our transition through these current challenging times on the earth, we need two main qualities – balance and patience.

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Balance… Balance can only be found by a certain amount of detachment from the outside world and all of its noise, busyness and distractions… Slowing down to find our balance means we focus more of our attention on our inner being. This involves checking in with our authentic self – i.e paying attention to what our feelings, our center of self/solar plexus, our bodies and our heart are communicating to us. It also involves (with love and compassion) tending to the forgotten, vulnerable, shadow parts of ourselves (our inner child/children), which we may find are being triggered by the outside world and especially our relationships.

What are the unique signs of your body and emotions, which tell you – you need to slow down and reconnect with your own unique rhythm and pace?

When you know you are feeling off-balance, what is your resistance to taking the time and space you need – to come back to your center of Self?

Patience… There is nothing else like precious time spent connecting and being one with Mother Nature. Reconnecting our bodies to her natural and ancient rhythms, seasons and cycles, allows us to remember we are not separate and to be patient with ourselves and our own growth process.

I really love and savour spending time in nature with both my dog and my partner Juerg. However, grounding my energy on a solitary walk in nature and or just sitting and being alone next to a tree, with my own thoughts and feelings is essential for me to retain a sense of well-being and harmony in our shared relationship. This is the same for Juerg too.

When did you last make quality, nurturing time and space for yourself – to be alone in nature – with out any distractions?

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In these times of deep transformation on the earth,
may you pause and rest when you need too…
may you find 
balance and patience…
so that you continue to move forward

with grace and confidence
on your own unique life path and journey.

©  Jaymie Elder

Photos shared are from a 5-hour saunter I made recently, to the top of Monte Zerbion (2722m) with stunning views of the Aosta Valley and three of the Giants of the Alps – Monte Rosa (4,634 m), Monte Bianco (4,810 m), and Gran Paradiso (4,061 m).

I find sacred moments of nourishment, inspiration, quiet reverence and solitude here in the mountains of Italy… where in the world do you find your own precious and healing moments in nature? I would love to hear from you, in the comments below…



Photography and words © Jaymie Elder 2019

My work is supporting and mentoring men and women to embrace their authentic being and be true to the timeless calling of their heart and soul. I offer intuitive guidance and support through Soul Sessions, which take place internationally via Skype. Soul Sessions are a unique chance to feel, reflect and connect with the deeper part of your being – your heart and soul.

For more information, or to book a session
please use the “work with me” link under the menu title – or click here

More reading from Rainbowtree Woman about the soul journey
and the path of healing and transformation, – click here

Do you long to experience life more from the level of your heart and soul…?

1 year ago, I was asking a question to my spirit guides about what this really means… and this was their reply to me…

Human beings naturally crave structure, security,
or a clear and straight path laid out before them.
Many search for a spiritual leader or community,
a daily routine, ‘an acceptable way’ to follow –
so life feels more safe, predictable and ‘known’…

But the heart yearns for the deeper springs of life
and the path of the soul
is uniquely your own.

It’s a pathway that you forge into the unknown
and only your heart can intuitively feel/know
what is right and true for you.

If you really choose this path,
with all your heart and being,
know that you will be challenged.

You will need courage and perseverance
to keep opening your heart
towards the unhealed shadow
– of which has been ‘hidden’ to you…

Experiences which may come to you
won’t always be easy, pleasant or beautiful…
It may sometimes feel as if you walk a lonely path
but you will always be much closer to us than you know…

Above all,…you will grow,…

There will be others…
Soul friends and spiritual companions to meet again,
Soul family to share laughter, tears,
wisdom and experiences along the way…

It will not matter,
if you only cross paths for a short moment
or never meet each other in the physical.
It’s the mutual exchange of heart energy,
which has the power to transform, heal,
inspire and illuminate lives.

Dear one,
to live your life from the level of the heart and soul
means to be open to heal your old wounds
and from limiting beliefs and conditioning,
create new, loving and joyful possibilities…

It means to recognise the importance of your inner work
and honour yourself as a sacred conduit –
here to help raise the consciousness and heart energy
on beautiful Mother Earth…

It means wherever possible,
guided by your feelings and heart
– to transform darkness, hurt and fear
into light, love, forgiveness, beauty,
appreciation and fulfillment.

This is the magic,
the spiritual alchemy,
the infinite possibility,
the realness, humility and freedom
of living – connected and true –
to your heart and soul.

Copyright © Jaymie Elder / Rainbowtree Woman 2018/2020

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“The knowledge of the heart is in no book
and is not to be found in the mouth of any teacher,
but grows out of you like the green seed from the dark earth.”
– Carl Jung (The Red Book)

Copyright © Jaymie Elder 2020 – Please only use this text unless written permission is received from Jaymie Elder. If you wish to use only some of this text on social media – please do so respectfully by acknowledging Jaymie as the author with links to her website/blog http://www.rainbowtreewoman.com.

If you enjoyed this post, please share it, follow my blog or register to receive notifications in your email box for my future posts. Thank you!


More reading from Rainbowtree Woman about the Soul Journey
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“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” – Carl Jung

“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” – Carl Jung …. i.e not who we “think” we should be, who others would like us to be, or who we think we should have been more, in order to receive love, approval and acceptance…

To become conscious of the wounds and various masks we adopted in childhood (and often continue to use later in our relationships) – is a lifes work and healing journey, which takes much courage and endurance.

However, I believe it is our free choice and great opportunity to consciously do our own inner healing work – rather than unconsciously re-create old family patterns or project our anger, hurt and pain out into the world and on to others.

Everything begins to transform and expand, the more we come from a place of love and acceptance for ourselves and value the uniqueness of who we are and the path we have walked in our own life (loving and challenging experiences).

For a long time, I have felt drawn to the energy and symbolism of the Lion. To me, the Lion represents the courage to be our authentic self, – to speak and act in harmony with our heart…even if it means, we stand alone in a crowd.

“Journey with my Lion – what it means to embody Lion energy” is a post I made 4 years ago, which incorporates my artwork and writing to share about some of my own vulnerabilities, strengths and awareness gained, through working closely (over a period of many months) with the energy and symbolism of the Lion and Lioness.

To read the post, click on my Lion painting and the quote by Carl Jung, below:

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All paintings and text copyright © 2019/21 Jaymie Elder

Soul work needs no approval or recognition from others

“Your work is not to drag the world into a new awareness, kicking and screaming.
Your work is to simply do your work, sacredly, secretly and silently
And those with “eyes to see” and “ears to hear” will respond….”
– Unknown


Recently, I have been spending time alone in the beautiful spring nature of the European Alps. Almost as soon as we arrived, I found myself drawn to the alpine wild flowers, abundant, lively bees and colourful hives around me…

 

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So what is the message of the bee? 

Above all, bee shows us devotion towards a higher purpose and the magical interconnectedness in all of life. Bee is completely devoted to work for the common good of the hive.

This can mirror the commitment we make to our own soul work – the on-going work of healing, transforming, learning and growing towards our higher purpose – Higher Self or spiritual potential.

*   *   *

“Ultimately, this devotion to our soul work
is the greatest service we offer humanity.
When we raise our vibration through healing  
and transforming our core wounds (our shadow)

– we influence the greater consciousness

of humanity and all of creation.”

*   *   *

Find that hard to believe? Over many years, I have observed that my own inner work has extended out to influence those around me in subtle ways – family, animals, partnerships, friends or strangers.

Our soul journey of healing and transformation, is unique to each one of us. As we continue on this journey, we can increasingly recognise the value of our inner work. This work does not require the approval or recognition of others! Perhaps this is the most liberating part about our soul work! …No one else in this world has lived, felt, seen and shared the same experiences as each one of us…No one else walks the same path to know and feel their own divinity – their own Higher Self or spiritual essence.


How can we integrate the wisdom of the bee into our own lives
and for our own Soul Journey?

The bee is a symbol for soul wisdom. Bee collects pollen from many flowers and turns it into nourishing honey – the gold of bees. Just so, we collect experiences from the many circumstances of our life – painful, loving, challenging and beautiful…and from these experiences we can extract spiritual gold.

This spiritual gold is a result of our willingness and courage to be honest and true to ourselves,… to feel deeply into our own wounds – our own patterns, beliefs, masks, our shadow personalities, our hurt inner children – all of which long for the light of our conscious awareness, understanding, love, forgiveness and compassion.

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Are we devoted to our path of healing (soul work)?

In today’s busy world, it is so easy to distract ourselves from facing and owning how we are truly feeling.

Just like any form of addiction, we can use social media to instantly distract ourselves from our emotions and feelings. Spending hours online, we can get lost amongst endless information, music, videos, nice photographs, “what we want to see” in order to “feel better“. Or, we may take the anger, frustration or helplessness we feel and project huge amounts of energy into endless arguments with people whom we may never meet in person.

These emotions and patterns will always re-surface again and again until we are ready to look at and work with the truth in ourselves. We can try, but in the end we can not hide from the truth. Eventually, when we are ready, our soul calls to us, ….loud enough so that we must pay attention.

We grow in love by having the courage to truly face (not turn away) from our uncomfortable emotions i.e. anger, doubt, fear, sadness, jealousy, etc…. We grow in love by being fully present and honest with ourselves and others. It is simple to write about but not easy to practise in all of our relationships, especially with ourselves.


Let us begin today, in small ways…
those with “eyes to see” and “ears to hear” will respond….

Let us practise being devoted and humble like the bee. Let us start today, in small ways,…becoming more present with our emotions, feelings and allowing our heart to guide us in all our actions.

The more we are practising this in our everyday lives, the more we realise that it is our energy that draws people and experiences to us. Rather than judge the experiences as good or bad / right or wrong, we trust and know that somewhere, somehow…. it is for the highest good of our souls evolution.

With an open mind and heart, we can ask for our own inner guidance to come forward….we delve deeper for the hidden (shadow) learning, messages and wisdom about our own life and journey, which can be reflected back to us through another person, experience or encounter. This is the way of the spiritual alchemist – the humble yet extraordinary bee – collecting pollen (experience) and transforming it into honey (wisdom).

This does not mean we over-analyse situations, experiences and people with our mind. We are inviting the wise, intuitive, feminine or feeling part of our being to come forward and help us to understand, transform, heal and grow.

When we look outside for recognition, rewards or approval for our actions our focus is mis-directed. With humility and devotion like the bee, we know that no matter what the outcome, we must keep moving forward on our journey.

*   *   *

You cannot force someone to comprehend a message
that they are not ready to receive.
But…. never underestimate the power of planting a seed.

*   *   *

The more we are being authentically who we are, (less concerned about what others think or say about us or trying to “prove” something to others)…we are vibrating (buzzing 🙂 ) in our core essence. We are touching others with our energy, dispersing seeds of consciousness, love and truth – meanwhile, always continuing with our own soul work.

This is truly the highest we can bee. 😊

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Bee Prayer: Winged spirit of sweetness,
I call on you.
Teach me the ways of
Transformation and fertilisation,
The path from pollen to sweetness honey.
Teach me to taste the essence
Of each place I alight,
Carrying that essence with me
To continue creation’s cycle.
Teach me the ways of hope,
Reminding me that what seems impossible
May yet be achieved.
Flitting tears of the gods,
Draw me ever closer to the wisdom
Hidden within beauty.
Give me flight and sunlight,
Passion and productivity,
Cooperation with those around me
And sharpened strength to defend my home.
May I ever spiral out from my heart,
Searching for what I need,
And return there once again
To turn those lessons into nourishment.
Bee spirit, I call you.
Source: Animal Totem

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Jaymie Elder is a soul journey guide, artist, photographer and traveller offering intuitive Soul Sessions internationally via Skype. Jaymie is dedicated to supporting others to heal and grow towards their authentic self – and a life in harmony with their heart and soul being. Learn more about Jaymie and her work here.

Please share your feedback in the comments below…If you enjoyed this post, please share it, follow my blog or register to receive notifications in your email box for my future posts. Thank you!

Copyright © Jaymie Elder 2018 – If you wish to use only some of the text you read here on social media – please do so respectfully by acknowledging Jaymie as the author with links to her website/blog http://www.rainbowtreewoman.com. All photography in this post: Copyright © Jaymie Elder / Juerg Dreamturtle 2018

 

The Soul Purpose of our Journey


Do you wish to grow towards being your authentic self,…
or continue to be pressured to “achieve”
based on the values and expectations of other people and society?

In today’s world, there is much pressure to conform and achieve according to the standards of other people and society. Success is seen as being “driven”, “motivated”, “famous”, “looking good”, “getting ahead” and accumulating status, popularity or material possessions.

Let us ask ourselves these questions,… Are we being true to our heart? Are we sharing the true essence of who we are? Despite our self-doubts and vulnerabilities, do we find the courage to keep moving forward and into the unknown? Is the life we live a reflection of our own gifts, talents, and creative expression? Are we sincerely devoted to our path of healing and growing? Are we in alignment with a greater, higher power rather than our ego’s shallow needs, wants and desires?

Mainstream society does not encourage self-reflection and completely neglects the inner journey of discovering who we are, embodying our unique, creative potential and a sense of purpose for our life.

Continue reading “The Soul Purpose of our Journey”

The Soul Purpose of our Journey

“The most essential in your life is your own being.

Without knowing the true essence of your being,
your heart will always remain empty and dissatisfied.

Without recognition of who you are, without inwardly awakening to that,
you stumble like a drunkard through a maze of meaningless limitations.

Remember your Self…

If you want to awaken to reality, no spiritual entertainment technique can help you.
You may have to go through the pain of disillusionment, but that’s in fact your liberation.

It is time to face yourself.

– Gayan Sylvie Winter and Jo Dose (The Native American Wisdom Tarot)

via The Soul Purpose of our Journey